All the People Prince Harry Must Apologize To In Order To Reenter the Realm

British royal family news divulges that Prince Harry, the Douche of Sussex turned 40 today. He emailed to People ahead of time to assure the public that he will celebrate with a “few” friends and then hike the burning mountains of California with the mystery guests.

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Meanwhile, royal expert Charlotte Griffiths took the time to compile a list of all the people Harry has to make amends to if he has a shot at reclaiming his old life as a kept prince. Here are a few of the aggrieved persons, in no particular order.

Prince Harry Needs To Apologize

Princess of Wales: Harry allowed his biographer Omid Scobie to label Kate Middleton a racist, he published her private emails in his memoir Spare, and he sat by while his first wife Meghan Markle let fly with bullying names for Kate to Oprah Winfrey.

Harry called Kate the sister he never had and at this point if she never speaks to him again no one will blame her.

Prince William: according to Griffiths “Harry’s name is no longer mentioned by friends in his presence.” Enough said. Except to add that Harry accused his brother of being a balding assaulter, complained that Willy got an extra sausage at breakfast, and was given a bigger childhood bedroom.

King Charles: In Spare, Harry called his father a poor communicator who doesn’t know how to listen and has “trouble being intimate face-to-face.” 

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Charles also refuses to give in to what many see as Harry’s emotional blackmail, demanding he get extra security or no one sees the grandkids in the UK again.

Harry’s Apology List

Queen Camilla: Harry publicly declared Charles’ second wife a “wicked stepmother, dangerous and a villain.” You can’t make this stuff up.

Princess Anne: Harry’s whiney autobiography accused his aunt of being “obsessed” with being the hardest working royal. The irony.

According to him, Anne “feverishly strived to have the highest number of official engagements recorded in the Circular each year. No matter what.” And dimwit Harry thinks this is a bad thing.

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Thomas Inskip: Harry’s childhood friend “warned Harry off marrying Meghan.”

Although he was invited to their wedding, he asked not to be godfather to Harry’s kids who no one ever sees, Archie and Lilibet.

Guy Pelly: was once thick as thieves with Harry but no he’s longer in touch. He’s also Prince Louis’s godfather.

Royal Family News – Harry Has Made Enemies

Duke of Westminster: he did not want Harry at his wedding this year, the high-profile, society wedding of 2024. But William was front and center.

Zara Tindall: Anne’s daughter. It’s reported that “She and Meghan are chalk and cheese and have never bonded.”

Peter Phillips: Zara’s older brother stood between Harry and William at Prince Philip’s funeral as they followed the coffin “something Harry may find hard to forgive.”

Did we miss anyone royal fans? Tell us who else you think Harry needs to apologize to before he is let back in the castle.

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Camilla Parker BowlesKate MiddletonKing CharlesMeghan MarklePrince HarryPrince WilliamRoyals NewsThe Royal FamilyThe Royal family News
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