Everything You Need to Know About Prince Harry & Meghan’s Pompous Colombian Vacay

British royal family news shows that the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, Prince Harry and Meghan, touched down in the ultrasafe city of Bogotá, Colombia.

They were invited by Vice President Francia Márquez, the first “Afro-Colombian to hold executive powers” in the country the US State Department warns against visiting: “Reconsider travel due to crime and terrorism. Exercise increased caution due to civil unrest and kidnapping.” But hey, if Harry is ok with Meghan being in Bogotá, who are we to naysay?

Here’s what to know about the four-day vacay the Markles will enjoy while the actual royals enjoy the safety and comfort of Balmoral.

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First of all, CNN notes that the Markles are in town to “support initiatives that protect children from online harm.” This parallels Harry and Meghan’s launch this month of “The Parents’ Network” a safety group that protects kids from online bullying.

What Meghan didn’t tell you during the launch is that she sent a jar of homemade jam to Chrissy Teigan who was cancelled for telling teenage Courtney Stoddard to kill herself.

Teigen sent a multitude of tweets to her victim including “my Friday fantasy: you. dirt nap. mmm baby” and “I hate you.” How awkward.

The Markles Do Bogotá

Ginger Judas and Grifter were greeted by Márquez and her partner, Rafael Pinillo. Did we mention that this is their second faux royal excursion this year, the first being to Nigeria (they were invited by a money launderer the FBI would love to capture).

This doesn’t mean that there is anything shady about the Markles going to Colombia where Meghan reportedly has a trip to an emerald mine planned.

After the two couples mingled, the vice president said that the “Sussexes share the same ideals and goals when it comes to championing a better, safer digital future and mental health landscape for our children and the world.” Did we mention Chrissy Teigan loves Meghan’s jam?

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Márquez wouldn’t leave well enough alone: “This is their first visit to Latin America. The goal is to build bridges and open doors to attend an issue that affects the whole of humanity: cyber harassment and online discrimination.”

Now on to the facts. According to CNN beautiful Columbia has endured “over 60 years of almost permanent civil conflict.” That hasn’t stopped the safety conscious Markles who next venture to Cartagena and Cali.

Royal Family News – Markle Folly

Assuming that they exit the country with limbs intact, Prince Harry and Meghan will attend the first Global Ministerial Conference on Ending Violence Against Children in November. Who wants to be the one to ask which of Meghan Markle’s jams is Chrissy Teigan’s favorite?

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