Lordy, Lordy, Look Who’s 40, Can Prince Harry Grow Up and Man Up?

British royal family news reveals that Prince Harry turns 40 on Sunday, September 15. That’s way past the point that a married man with two kids should demand an allowance from daddy, yet here we are.

Harry also thinks he can trash his family and tear down the monarchy and still be welcomed back to both with open arms. Maybe it’s his admitted drug habit that has him thinking this way.

Royal Family News – Harry Turns 40

Whatever the problem is, Harry is a man without a country, married to a failed B-list cable actress, and tons of people think he is lying about having two kids who are never seen, nor taken on the numerous vacations the Markles go on.

He is a headline staple, all the while begging for privacy. In what is a new low even for Z-listers, this week Harry emailed People asking them to print something nice about his upcoming birthday. The good news is, up is the only direction left for Ginger Judas.

Prince Harry presumably will spend his milestone birthday at home in Montecito, California, with a small circle of friends. We’ll take his word for it.

Then, he plans to take a few pals hiking in the nearby mountains which are all on fire right now. Who needs enemies when Harry is around?

Most people at 40 have a sense of direction, a life plan in place. What has Harry got? No achievements to the point that he has to “buy” undeserved awards like ESPN’s Pat Tillman Award and accept invitations from money launderers to tour their country and act like he’s still royal.

His first wife, Meghan Markle, has done no better. Her list of failures might even be longer than Harry’s: ARO, Spotify, Jamscam, the list goes on.

What  -s Left For Harry And Meghan?

As expected for such a momentous occasion for a once gilded human, the media is full of speculation about Harry’s next chapter.

The Sunday Times reports that Harry’s friends think he is not happy: “All he does is spend time looking back.” Back at the burnt bridge he and his wife set on fire like gleeful goblins.

Nixing this narrative, other “friends” claim that Harry is “looking to the future with excitement and a list of projects, including another Netflix special, this one about the elite world of professional polo.”

Yahoo reports that later this month he will be in New York hyping his hypocritical eco-travel company and for The Diana Award, named in honor of his late mother Diana; hardly the Oscars or the Earthshot Awards.

Royal Family News – Harry’s Next Chapter

Harry seems focused on giving reasons why his family can’t spend time in the UK with the people who raised him and would love to see the grandchildren; excuses that melt away given Harry and Meghan’s recent tours of Colombia and Nigeria.

Harry wants us to believe that the UK is “still dangerous, and all it takes is one lone actor, one person who reads this stuff to act on what they have read, and whether it’s a knife or acid, whatever it is, and these are things that are of genuine concern for me.”

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Experts blame Harry for fomenting the negativity by verbally abusing his family and monetizing his trashy time as a boozy, drug addled royal. Harry’s sole successes these days seem to involve winning petty lawsuits such as one against the Mirror group of newspapers.

Royal Family News – Harry Isn’t Safe In The UK?

Anna Whitelock, Professor of the History of the Monarchy at City, University of London said that Harry would do well to act fast before the drawbridge to the castle closes up completely: “Reports suggest that whilst Charles would be open to a return of some sort on the part of his son and daughter-in-law, William absolutely wouldn’t be open to that.”

Tell us royal fans, do you feel sorry for Hazbeen, or do you think he so richly deserves the spoils of his nasty labor?

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