Prince Harry and Meghan Markle Can’t Wait To Be Commoners in Malibu

Megxit is finally here, the infamous, unprecedented day that The Duke and Duchess of Sussex cease to be senior royalty and achieve their wildest dream of being just like you and me: common, simple, ordinary (should I be offended?).

We know the emperor had no clothes, but someone really should tell the couple that house-hopping from one country to the next, selecting only the richest enclaves to couch surf, and demanding someone, anyone, pay for your protection, is akin to stripping down bare for all the world to see your striving soul.

Megxit has Arrived and the Future Looks Wide Open

Today is the day that Prince Harry, 35, and his wife Meghan Markle, 38, will no longer use the word royal in their titles. A small matter on paper, but Megxit was an act that cleaved the very private and musty British Monarchy wide open, giving commoners and royalty alike the chance to gawk at the family’s private and professional innards which had previously been protected by a crack P.R. machine.

Harry and Meghan are no longer senior members of the Firm, and it remains to be seen how they will handle their freedom after they fought so bitterly and publicly to divorce themselves from the royal family.

We must rely on second hand reports about how the couple is faring with a source telling Vanity Fair (title so apt), “It hasn’t been an easy time for them but they are looking forward to starting a new chapter and being the couple they want to be. They are genuinely excited about the next chapter.”

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Truth be told, I would be genuinely excited, heck I would be over the moon, to be in their shoes. They have the world at their feet, and now is the time to show who they really are, the kind of couple they want to be.

What Will Harry and Meghan Do With Their New Selves?

In reality Harry and Meghan are a lot like you and me. They are a young couple looking to establish an identity outside the shadow of their family tree. They have nattered on about wanting to make a difference in the world and bring about positive change, but their ambitions, not their elbow grease, are on full display. Take for instance Harry’s cringeworthy plea to Disney head Bob Iger which landed Meghan a voiceover in, “Elephants.” Surely that will shift the global axis to good!

Harry and Meghan shared this brief, blithe message on the Sussex Royal Instagram account Monday night: “Thank you for your support, inspiration and commitment to the good in the world.” They promised to continue their charity work divulging that they are focused on, “how to best contribute,” while diving into their new chapter. Oh, and they want us to focus on the coronavirus pandemic, not them.

It’s easy to mock this seemingly shallow (Harry was duped into a hoax conversation with Greta Thunberg, Meghan visits soup kitchen corporate headquarters) twosome for the benevolent dictator vibe they constantly throw around like holy water on the masses.

And yet it’s admirable what they say they want to do. Who doesn’t want positivity and goodness to blanket the world like a good-quality cashmere sweater? We all want to do good and be good, to look good, and have others think highly of us.

How Badly Might Prince Harry Flip Out if Meghan Starts Acting Again and is Required to Kiss Another Man? #MeghanMarkle https://t.co/gxZKlEps3w

— SOS/CTS/HH (@SoapOperaSpy) April 7, 2020

The problem so far with Harry and Meghan is that they’re spouting their mantras from private jets and fortified mansions, telling us to do what they say not what they do. Eyeroll, any 8-year old will tell you this kind of hypocrisy goes in one ear and out the other.

In the meantime they reportedly will focus on their family (presumably the members they haven’t ostracized), support and work with their pre-existing charitable commitments and develop their future non-profit organization.

Yes, Harry and Meghan sound holier than thou, are hypocritical, and have yet to prove they will change the world for the better.

They’re human like the rest of us. They deserve happiness, health and the best that life has to offer. I hope they succeed in their very best ambitions, the ones that make life better for everyone. Until then, can they go away and maybe figure out how to crank out more ventilators for the people too sick focus on the next chapter?