Royal Family News: Prince Harry Shares Disturbing Details About Losing His Virginity

British royal family news reveals that just when you thought Prince Harry could not get any more cringe, he goes and pops off in his memoir Spare about losing his virginity. As a teen with an unnamed older woman in a field. Can it get any more grisly than this, Harry recounting his teen deflowering in lurid detail—why? Why? WHY? For the love of god someone please make him stop, the never ending steam of verbal projectile diarrhea coming out of this guy’s privileged potty mouth is absolutely gobsmacking.

Royal Family News – Harry Lost His Virginity

Why does Dirty Harry think we need to know how he lost his virginity? If someone can answer that correctly I need you to pick my next lotto numbers. Because this habit of his, kissing and telling both literally and figuratively is, to use his own word, “bonkers.”

Back to the necessary narrative of Harold the Duke of Sussex describing his first sexual encounter: he was treated like a “young stallion” in a field behind a pub where people were coming and going. Question: how did the paparazzi miss that?
Fast forward to a post-coital moment when, “one of the Royal Family’s bodyguards Marko paid him a visit.” More naming and shaming, nice Harry.

Royal Family News – Humiliated Harry

Prince Harry wrote that he, “suspected Marko had heard about his “humiliating” one-night stand. Because Harry never takes responsibility for his actions, it was the stallion riding older woman’s fault—this is the takeaway?

*Trigger warning: this next part could induce sudden loss of vision, the visual is that stunning.*

Harry, a nearly 40-year old man wrote: “I suspected he was referring to my recent loss of virginity, a humiliating episode with an older woman who liked macho horses and who treated me like a young stallion.”

Royal Family News – Humiliated Harry Like A Stallion

No, it gets better: “I mounted her quickly, after which she spanked my ass and sent me away. One of my many mistakes was letting it happen in a field, just behind a very busy pub.”

Royal Family News: Prince Harry Slams King Charles And Prince William, Wants A Family

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Ironically the real reason Marko was sent to Flirty Harry was because King Charles was worried about his drug use. Just do better Harry, for your kids’ sake if nothing else.

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